Joe Paterno: Alternative Biography

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Created: Wednesday, 01 February 2012 19:34

Written by Joe

Before ChefDiddy I was a heavy contributor at BroCouncil.com. Today, Ray, the guy who runs BroCouncil went back into his archives and pulled out an article I wrote 2 years ago about Joe Paterno. Before the rape and him dying stuff happened.

Follow the link and read it, it's well worth it. You'll learn a wide array of facts about Joe Paterno. Like how he helped George Washington Carver invent peanut butter and swam 550 miles from the Titanic to the shores of Newfoundland.

I like to think it is one of the finer pieces I've put together.

[via BroCouncil.com]

Women's Basketball: Wicked Crossover

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Created: Thursday, 23 February 2012 07:20

Written by Joe

Gouging out my own eyes. Punching myself in the dick. Having a stroke. Contracting AIDS.

These are all things I'd rather be doing than being forced to watch a women's basketball game. It doesn't matter what league it is. From high school, to college, to the WNBA, it's all bad.

Just how bad? Watch this clip from a D2 College game.

[via Deadspin]

I was teaching them how to shower. I swear!

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Created: Thursday, 15 December 2011 17:42

Written by Joe

Everybody knows the Jerry Sandusky story so I'm not going to waste any time talking about it here. Instead I will focus on some of the things his lawyer recently said regarding it.

First up is this doozy:

Teaching a person to shower at the age of 12 or 14 sounds strange to some people, but people who work with troubled youth will tell you there are a lot of juvenile delinquents and people who are dependent who have to be taught basic life skills like how to put soap on their body.

He was teaching them how to shower correctly. When you break it down, the only way you can shower incorrectly is if you get into the shower with your cloths on and/or you do not turn the water on. That's it. All you need to do is be naked and turn the water on. Even if you don't scrub yourself clean with soap, you're still showering more than most teenagers do. Thanks Mr. Sandusky, you're a life saver!

He continues and states that Mr. Sandusky:

Shouldn't have showered with those kids.

Really? You're telling me that it was a bad idea for a grown man to shower correctly (see paragraph above for break down on what constitutes proper showering) with a young boy? I never made the connection. Thanks Mr. Obvious! You're a life saver!

[via CollegeFootballTalk.com]